Can I just start by saying infertility sucks…

I mentioned a few posts ago that we were waiting for a re-referral back to our fertility clinic after being discharged due to not having an appointment in 6 months. So as promised here is an update on what happened at our appointment earlier this week. I can’t help but feel like we are starting from the beginning of our fertility journey. However, before I jump into this post, I know how lucky I am to have Baby bear who is healthy and happy and I know I’m lucky to have him when there are couples out there who haven’t been given that opportunity. This being said I do feel upset and heavy-hearted by our secondary infertility, it sucks no-one ever thinks after having one healthy pregnancy (that was completely unplanned) you would then go on to loss 4 pregnancies and struggle to fall pregnant. 

Before I go into what was said and what we have to face moving forward I just want to say I now have a new infertility doctor, I’m still with the same clinic but we have a new doctor. The thought of dealing with a new doctor and her team who haven’t been through the last year with us is quite scary. And I will admit I cried on the phone going over all my history and every detail of all our losses as well as knowing we are going to have to go over a lot more things in the future until my new team catch up. On the other hand, I am happy we’ve got a new doctor and team as this could mean we find out some different answers and end up having a healthy pregnancy. As much as I liked my old doctor, after my surgery I kinda felt like he wasn’t willing to look into anything else to see what was going on. He didn’t want to see or hear from us until we fell pregnant again.  

To start off with she asked my pregnancy history, how far along I was with each loss and then went on to ask what happened during each loss. After getting emotional and struggling to share all the information I needed to in the right order. My doctor then asked me to go over any plans we had in place with my previous doctor. I must say my doctor was super patient with me and let me take all the time I needed which was amazing.

After talking through our history the doctor asked me abit about Baby bear to lighten the mood I think. I think they were more get to know us questions than fertility questions. She then went over her plan moving forward for us, explaining everything along the way (not that I caught all of it with Baby bear screaming and playing ridiculously loud right outside the bedroom, thanks little man).

Of what I did catch and reading over the letter she sent to us and my GP I have a lot of blood work she wants to be done. Mainly to get some upto date levels as I haven’t had any done since my surgery and now my cycle is varying between 25-33 days she wants to see what my body is doing at different points in my cycle. I also have to have more cervix swabs and scans. It’s the same as last time really but this time we don’t have to do the genetic testing however our new doctor has decided that she wants Daddy bear to give a sample to be tested. We have asked to have Daddy bears sample looked at before with our old doctor as after they run all the tests on me and found nothing other than my blood clotting issue, we wanted to keep looking for an answer. That’s not to say Daddy bear is the issue at all but by testing his sample it will give us a better picture of what’s going on for us.

I’d be lying if I said I was 100% happy about doing it all, its sucks and I tired of it. I’m tired of everything being so hard, I hate that something that should be easy is undoubtedly hard for us. But I know we will get there and it will all be worth it in the end… well hopefully. I hate infertility and I’m here for anyone else going through this.

Chin up mummas we got this x